Friday, November 18, 2011

Xmas Dinner

Already looking forward to the Holidays, and the Xmas gorge-and-drink-a-thon.

One half of my people didn't invent any food; not cheese, nor decent sausage with fricking fennel, they just ate whatever they could find. All of it. 

Except for Hard Sauce: they invented Oreo filling, rolled it into balls and then fought each other to the death for it. 

That's considered a "rare treat" because our "stuffing" predates turkeys and involves a Lot of Balls.

It's mostly balls, with organs and stolen horsefeed, actually.
And entrails. Stuffed right into those bulging entrails.

Mmmm, entrails ... 

Wait a minute -- hard sauce, Brussels Sprouts, baked testicles? It's all balls!
Man, we are all about the balls for the holidays. I have eaten so very many.

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Truth and Dare

I'm terribly terrifically drunk on plonk, and in honor of Hallowe'en I'm about to screen "The Exorcist" in the dark, alone, at midnight. "Sleepy Hollow" was not nearly enough tonight.

You can't have any idea how long it took to edit that intro into coherence. If I never post again it's because of what I am about to do. I know you wish me luck.

PS I have a sock-monkey and some cinnamon gum. I'll be OK.

Friday, September 9, 2011

And That's The Way it Was

I'm 45, which is exactly halfway as far as I intend to go.
I come from a world far away and very different from this one:

In my day, we were shocked about Watergate -- because no president would never incriminate himself.

You had to have terrible skin to be a movie actor.

Huge computers were made just to eat tiny bits of paper. Nothing was learned from this.

Music used human voices. "Sampling" was stealing. You'd never work again.

TV was always a parade of morons -- but for us they scripted it all. The laugh track taught us what was funny. If you didn't laugh it got very loud.